Read more“Now is not the time to draw back in fear. It is a time when we must rise up and flourish in love.” – Lisa Bevere (Girls with Swords)
Pushing Past Disappointment
It was nearly midnight and we were cozied up on a teal couch in the beautiful city of Gainesville, Georgia. My husband, Brady and I were in a season of the in-between. We had been preparing to venture on an 11 month mission trip to 11 different countries for what seemed like ages, but it had been about a year and half. Raising money, gathering all of our travel gear and watching endless episodes of Man vs. Wild. It was exciting.
What wasn’t exciting was the deep feeling in my gut of hopelessness and a lost path.
You see, it had been a month, 30 dragged out days of wonder and waiting. Where would we go next?
It was in this time that Brady and I were learning that God’s plan for us is sometimes very different than our own plan for our lives. Needless to say, we were crushed. Through quite the turn of events, after completely changing our lifestyles and extensive amounts of time devoted to The World Race, we failed. We made it to 2 of the 11 countries anticipated (though we had traveled through 8 countries total) in that six week period of time.
What we saw as the end, the Lord had planned as just the beginning.
As our dreams were crushed, our faith was being awakened.
For those 30 days, we were stranded. We were not where we were supposed to be, and we certainly weren’t doing what we had planned. We were in Georgia and our squad of 53 other teammates were on their way to Romania. I wouldn’t exactly say we were thrilled, rather filled like smoke from a wildfire with jealousy, confusion and painful disappointment. I continuously asked myself, “why would the Lord bring us to do such an amazing thing and then strip it away from us? But at that time, only He knew.
God is the author of our story: It was well-written before the beginning of time, long before our first breath. He knew the path set before us when we were trying to run our own way. He simply picked us up, and re-routed us. Don’t get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with The World Race, it was incredible for us, but instead of being the final destination, is was but a starting point. The white line on track where the guy with the gun says “Runners, on your mark.” Then, the trigger was pulled. and my oh my, was the bang from the gun reverberating in my ears.
At that moment in time, He didn’t want us on the mountain tops of Bulgaria or in the sheep pastures of Albania, He wanted us reclined on the teal couch. Our ears and eyes wide open, our hearts longing for wisdom, for answers, for Him.
He was calling us back to himself, calling us to follow him on the road less traveled. The one that made us afraid.
What was more unnerving than traveling around the world with just a bag on my back and knowing that I’ll be gone from all that I’ve known for 11 whole months? Disappointment. The place where we believed that we failed and all that we’ve hoped and dreamed is over.
Disappointment tries to convince us to give up, but this is where we get to push forward despite our fears. This is where our faith is strengthened as we walk into the uncertainties of life with the One who knows all things. The One who’s always known.
What is holding you back?
Push past disappointment, shake off the dust and let your faith be undeniably awakened.
“Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing!
Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland.” –Isaiah 43:18-19
Read moreIt’s in the risks that there’s discovery. When you do something outside the bounds of what you’re used to doing, that’s where you’re most likely to learn something new about yourself. – Patsy Clairmont
What Happened in Guatemala, Doesn’t Stay in Guatemala
The past six months that I lived in Guatemala felt like a lifetime.
(In a good way)
I’ve been blessed to have met women like Veronica.
She has a beautiful heart and a radiant smile that always left me laughing.
She began as my Spanish teacher and quickly became a dear friend.
Since being back in the States,
(I’d like to say back home, but I’m still confused where home truly is)
I’ve come to the awakening of the gaping hole in my chest.
It’s difficult to leave your heart in another country with people who became apart of your story.
When your lives collide and you realize that you are more alike than you could’ve ever imagined.
That despite cultural differences, and sometimes (a lot of times) language barriers, we are human.
We all possess the deep longing to be seen and to be loved.
I came back to Florida and knew that the wild world outside had changed me.
My eyes couldn’t see things the same, though at times, they tried.
I longed for the warm embrace of a beautiful Mayan friend that I’ve met on the street.
The woman named Thomasa that I’ve adopted as my abuelita (little grandma).
She sells mangoes, papaya, and watermelon every day at the age of eighty-seven.
It’s these kinds of people who leave a lasting impact on the heart.
The ones who are content with the little they have, and encourage you to share in their joy.
They are the ones who changed my eyes, and I’ll forever be grateful to them.